Artistic checks is a big ol'ripoff so watch out if you order from them. Rant below.
Due to a mix-up in my account number, I called to request that the checks I had bought, paid for be returned and reprinted with the right information. They said they could put in another order for me at half price. Well, the additional money was taken out of my account immediately and I was sent to the bank to have them fax the correct info. Soon I was advised that I needed to go back to the bank for yet more info to be faxed. Not about to go through all that, I canceled the new order. They only refunded part of the money that they took out for the new checks- that weren't even printed yet! So, they have $36 for checks I can't use, plus $8 for, umm, nothing.

Okay enough of that, I hope everyone who celebrates the holidays had a good one, or is at least glad it's over;). Give me a call, I'm on between 9pm and 2am Monday thru Friday.

My wish came true, it is cold outside! Now I have the urge to get naked and all snuggled up in bed with a couple of down comforters on top and pillows all over the place. The phone will be on the nightstand so I can stay there while we chat (winks).

Thank-you Mr. Magic :) Christmas music always helps get me in the mood for the season, I just can't bring myself to hate it in spite of so many others saying they do. Santa Baby is a classic, I prefer the Eartha Kitt version, and the song about how cold it is outside- the Dean Martin one- I just love. It makes me think (fantasize) about being seduced by a smooth man plying me with red wine while snow sparkles outside in the background and there is a fire and cozy rug in front of it. Sigh. Hopefully it will get cold as scheduled soon.

In other news, there is a tennis bracelet stuck on my wrist. Now, jewelry is great, but so is sleeping and showering completely naked so if the catch doesn't let go soon a trip to the jewelers is coming up. Oh my god, it just came off! The miracle of blogging regularly folks, proven here tonight.

I love shopping! Today one of my special friends took me shopping and now I have off-white snow bunny boots, new sexy Seven jeans, and best of all, white gold and diamond earrings! Soo excited- that is the way to get me in the holiday spirit. Football is a good thing too except for my poor Bucs unless things changed in the 4th quarter, but I'm holding out hope that the Colts continue winning today. Presents get me in a naughty mood so call me soon!

The living and dining room are decorated now- that is as far as I go, it's enough to keep the rest of the rooms clean and clutter free, and found an old Barnes and Noble gift card from so long ago its embarrassing- but it miraculously kept its value so I just ordered a fashiony calendar as a gift to myself. The Christmas spirit is working for sure! Even took a couple of pics, they're a little dark as it is nighttime but the night-time is the right time (so corny yet true :)

I was wrong about the running shoe store, it was crowded and all the salespeople were busy. So, no new shoes yet. Guess it's safe to do a little shopping today, the middle of the week is usually best during the holidays. A lovely tree is now in my dining room, can't get enough of the sparkling lights especially when they are the only lights on and I am relaxing with a nice glass of wine listening to Xmas music or watching an old movie.
Rewatching "The Women" last night I actually paid attention to the introduction guy and, did you know there are no men in the film? If you saw it you probably do- I never noticed! And I love men :) Real life men though, can do without Bruce Willis types. A bright sunny day is beckoning me to step away from the computer, I hope everyone is enjoying Tuesday!

Thanksgiving is over and I'm a little relieved, how about you? It is just weird that a big holiday is so focused on eating- yes I'm aware of Feast Days but still, so much time devoted to a meal is hard for me to wrap my mind around. Now we can get down to the real thing- sparkly lights and presents! Why then am I not at a store today you may be wondering, well I take shopping seriously and there are way too many amateurs out there right now for one thing. The ideal shopping experience includes well ordered merchandise, lack of crowding, big peaceful dressing rooms and attentive salespeople. Chances of any of those factors happening today- ZERO!

Except, I bet the running show store will be safe to enter so new running shoes today!

Ok, "Chuck" is the funniest show on TV I have ever seen, hands down. Lots of eye candy too, if you are into that like I am and my friend David is too (he is a bit more involved then me), so I am adding his blog to my links- enjoy! Happy Thanksgiving too, this year I am attempting to gourmet up the classic green bean casserole with fresh mushrooms sauteed in butter. Hopefully it will go over better then imported cheese does at these family get-togethers. If I get a peaceful moment I will turn on my listing so check back when you need a break from the relatives.

Blogger has been weird lately- loading slow and sometimes just unavailable. Trying to put up some pics while I'm here and maybe get someone in the Xmas mood a little early. Everyone knows how I feel about shoes and sexy lingerie, I'm also looking at those stick things you plug into your computer to copy stuff onto as the pictures I have on here take up lots of room on cd's and I have trust issues as far as computers go. I mean, when you're using a Macbook and it's going as slow as my neighbor's 1998 Gateway what the hell?

Tricked! I was lured to Orlando by my best friend from college for the Epcot Food and Wine Festival- an afternoon and evening of drinking among adults (mostly) when the plans changed. Next thing I knew, I was getting up at 7am and on the way to MGM Studios- crowds and kids and cutely costumed characters and no wine!!! Why go, well because when the original plan was discussed another friend offered to get us in free and my buddies are really into the whole Disney experience.

When we finally got to Epcot, it turned out the wine was served in little plastic goblets so I switched to beers around the world, which were quite yummy (as were some of the dads in the throng thank god something to look at). So yeah, too wiped out to go to the drag show that night, I chilled in one of the most amazing suites eveh, 1600 square feet anyone? Spa tub, granite on every countertop including both bathrooms, it was niiice.

Moral? Enjoy Orlando by staying away from the theme parks and get an awesome room, hit some eating establishments to see the cute waiters [waves and winks at Mike from the Cheesecake Factory] and shop the Millenia Mall and the outlets.

I admit to having never seen a Fellini film, so I recorded "Satyricon" and settled in for a couple of hours of lust. That was disappointing! Why every single actor had to have heavy drag queen makeup caked on is beyond me. We know they're gay- it's the plot (such as it is)and the ridiculous makeup killed the film for me. Turning attractive actors into such hideous caricatures makes me think that Fellini was seriously conflicted about his views on sexuality in spite of the film's hype that suggests that the director approves of homosexuality. Going to have to watch some real gay porn to see any hotties apparently.

Luckily, I also recorded the film "The Barefoot Contessa" so Ava Gardner massaged my eyes for a while in the old tragedy- wearing fabulous clothes in all but one scene.

Fashion! You all know I love fashion especially when the unexpected happens, for example a model ignores a large hole in the runway, heads straight for it and the, well not completely unexpected occurs.

Links are finally working!!! Try them out, all the blogs I link to are awesome :)

Wow, what is everyone up to tonight? I should be getting some very interesting reports soon when you tell me what was going on that kept you away from home. So-o, I will post some pictures of my pretty feet (or at least, very well-maintained feet).

Well-played Top Chef! I almost didn't watch this season after last years debacle, but am so pleased. Finally a reality show where the contestants appear cognizant of the fact that they will be needing jobs after the show ends. They behaved like adults! Whoo-hoo no ridiculous "virgin" taunting and a powerful diss on the overuse of curry (too late, where was that when pud Elian won, but still). So, yeah, good show.

Also, dear gods of television, if someone could please arrange a full makeover for Perez Hilton so my eyes don't have to start watering in the ten seconds it takes for me to find the remote and change the channel to something he isn't on, I will greatly appreciate it.

I found the pillows I wanted! Not quite the quality level desired, so we'll see how long they continue to look nice but for now my living room is perfect. Now onto the bedroom. A late sleeper, bright airy bedrooms do nothing for me, I like them dark, cool and sexy. The room is pretty much complete, just needs something on the walls.

http://thesuperficial.com/image.php?path=/2007/09/0927_pamela_anderson_premiere_04.jpg Is this photoshopped?

Jealous!! So, New Yorkers can just come home from work, flip on the TV and see reviews of the runway shows while I pay to have a "Style" channel that only shows makeovers done by insipid self proclaimed stylists and wedding shows 24/7. Oh well, my condo is big! Multiple rooms! Costs 1/5th of a NY studio! Now I feel better, a little. Wonder what's on TV? My psychic powers tell me "Who's Wedding is it Anyway?" is on with the equally exciting "Design on a Dime" competing with it. That is why everyone is wearing capris people!

Here is what I want, two big 36" down/feather mix pillows for my couch, in different rich shades of brown, preferably Ultrasuede covers that can be removed by the zippers and cleaned then replaced. Do they exist in stores or only in my head? Will I have to buy a sewing machine and learn to sew in order to get what I want?? Only the future knows for sure. I need a nap before starting a quest like this.

Corbett Canyon Chardonnay was talked up a bit by the fine folks at the Box Wine blog- which would have a link inserted here if my computer or brain was co-operating- so I bought myself a box of it earlier today. It is actually good! No weird perfume in the mouth flavor and not watery kool-aid wine that the cheap kind sometimes is, and devoid of skunkiness. So yay, a find, thanks guys! And, how lovely to have a glass of wine in general after the Plague of September 2007 that I barely made it through alive. So, big plans should be on course for tomorrow but as it is 3:55am here and the wine is lovely there is a good chance I will sleep through much of the day. What? I will work out next week...

Wish of the Month- that the Style network would show lots of footage of Fashion Week, the runway shows, behind the scenes and the real reviews of the shows instead of insipid dull makeover shows and the dreaded Wedding Series. I wish this on every falling star there is this month. Also if some designers accepted the existence of breasts on women, that would be icing on the chocolate cake. Cheers!

Thank-you all for the sympathy! Well, it was pretty horrible for a while- tried every home remedy I could think of, gave in and took some liquid medicine which made my symptoms Worse and finally, desperately decided to hit a store and buy some chicken soup. After unsucessfully searching for soup that is both organic and has a lot less then 70% of the recommended amount of sodium (like I want to be sick and bloated!) I gave up and just bought the raw ingrediants to make it myself.

The soup worked! The raw sore throat that was the most painful symptom was immediately eased to a slight discomfort in the background. Go figure. So, I am looking forward to chatting with my phone friends, if I should have a coughing fit I promise to send you a couple of free minutes to make up for it next time- the coughing is still unpredictable but at least the frog voice is better.

Soup stuff list I used: all organic or no hormone/antibiotic skinless chicken thighs (on the bone is best), celery, onion, garlic, carrots, butter, sea salt, water of course. I used the butter to brown the chicken in the bottom of the dutch oven while I cleaned and chopped up the veggies, first time trying that and it made a nice richness of flavor. So happy it worked!

Sick! A sore throat doesn't sound like any big deal, well I have the mother of sore throats right now. My voice, such that it is, sounds like a frog, it feels like the back of my throat is completely closed and POO! Hate this! So, I'm not out of town or anything fun like that, and do hope to be able to take calls soon.

Lack of ice! My 'yuck' of the week was going to be Georges Debeouf Chardonnay (table wine) but, when it gets warm it is not too bad- oaky as hell but much better then it was while nicely (to my American palete) cooled. So go figure, a country that makes lack of ice a good thing, who knew?? What else, well Publix's green something brand meat is quite good, it contributed to the most awesome spaghetti EVER! Seriously, if Gordon Ramsay tasted my dish earlier tonight he would have proposed right then! I would of course have directed him to my post re marriage- after a bit of practice hehe. Where the heck is my Tarot friend??? I was worried about you until I saw that you were reading cards left and right :)

While chatting on the phone the other day, I found myself in a humorous argument over which of us sounded more like an attorney that ended up with my admission of previously considering a career in law. I chose literature for my B.A. because I love it, and knew that the grades obtained would get me into law school.

Earning that degree was wonderful, the courses were interesting, my professors were eccentric and fellow students were diverse. I was kind of depressed when I actually graduated. There I was, with the gpa and lsat scores, signed up with lsac, paid lots of fees, should have been ready to go. But I wasn't. The applications piled up, colorful with pictures of beautiful campuses and happy students. Sometimes I'd start to fill one out but mostly the pile just loomed at me from the corner of my desk. I had cold feet, so the shake myself out of it I found the "best" paralegal degree in my area and signed up for that.

At first it was ok, the classes were pretty basic, memorize stuff and take tests no biggie. The instructors were all attorneys and we asked lots of those legal questions one wonders about but never really knows the answers to (bad sentence, I know). Then came the course in Legal Research. Suddenly the only students in class were the people specifically earning a paralegal degree- that means 90% women, and the crusty old circuit judge the taught it.

If literature is a wild jungle of ideas, emotions and experiences, a groaning buffet table from Medieval Times with food piled high on everyone's plate and glasses overflowing with wine and a handsome man next to you slyly groping your thigh, then Legal Research is sitting on the floor in the corner of a cold empty jail cell with a piece of stale melba toast in your mouth. I was sliding into an intellectual coma that deepened with every hour in the law library.

Thinking I might already be dead and in Hell for all of the bad things I'd done, I figured I might as well jump of out a plane and find out. It was amazing. I never went back to class.

Product review time! A couple of weeks ago I received an insert from Clinique offering a sample of their new mascara in exchange for one of my old mascaras. Sounded good, so I went through my makeup to find one that disappointed and headed to the department store to swap it out. Well, this was my first experience with a make-up consultant that didn't want anything to do with me. As soon as she saw the insert in my hand she looked at me with thinly disguised disgust and handed me a small sample mascara and headed in the other direction. If you are unfamiliar with the world of department store make-up, I assure you this behavior is unheard of. I literally had to stop her to ask the name of the product she had handed to me and some of its features.

The most important part of mascara for me is that it coats, lengthens and does not need another brush to remove clumps. She assured me that this mascara has two tips, brush and comb, so there would be no need for another brush. Wrong. The brush side doesn't do much of anything, while the comb side gave me 4 really thick lashes which were only fixed with, wait for it, a different brush. So, Clinique high definition lashed mascara was not an upgrade. I'm considering tossing the sample.

My friend is trying out for a part in "The Birdcage" for local theater. I think he will get the part.

Validation! The September Vogue finally made it down South and it is as big as a phonebook. Looking through it, I was reminded of a recent conversation with a friend. Said friend was having the fashion issue of boring looking dresses in pictures. I suggested a brooch. Well I may as well have suggested that he wear a diaper on his head based on the strong negative reaction received!

"That's something my grandmother would do" was said. So you can imagine the sweet smugness that welled up in me when I came to the feature article regarding the recent popularity of brooches amoung the uber-chic. Anna forgot to make sure that I was referenced as an early fan of the lovely brooch and it's property of bringing a little sparkle to an otherwise dull outfit or dress, but that's okay. I prefer to keep NY fashionstas at a safe (and long) distance. They're mean cuz they're hungry.

Degree in dusting? After waking up at an ungodly hour to help move a huge T.V., I was settling down to have a little breakfast before going back to bed when I saw something that made me gag. Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary is now offering a degree in homemaking, offered only to women, "aiming the students to model the characteristics of the godly woman as outlined in Scripture." (http://www.christianpost.com/article/20070815/28912_Baptists_Debate_New_Seminary_Degree_in_Homemaking.htm) Insulting as that is, the cherry on top was the deluded spokeswoman for the seminary conducting her interview with the Today show in front of a statue of (I presume) Mary Magdalene washing Jesus' feet. Although, in a seminary like this the statue could as easily be portraying "The Correct Role for Women."

And people wonder why I never got married? Of course not every man will expect that submission (or get it) but the immense pile of steaming baggage that the institution of marriage drags behind it is so difficult to ignore. It's Friday and I have the sudden desire for a very sinful weekend ;)

Well the electrician was a little over $200.00 to replace the outlet and ground my power box outside including drilling in the inconvienently placed driveway. Could of been worse. Now if I want to watch tv it is like watching the television in my aunt's basement with stolen and badly installed cable during the early days of MTV. My date with the cable guy is Friday. Do I have exciting stuff to do or what? Oh well, no complaining, the folks in Texas have it worse with a big-ol tropical storm on the way so send good vibes over there and let's all hope for the best and be prepared to help if it turns into a disaster.

Yikes lightning is not kidding! So there I was minding my own business last night watching the finale of Hell's Kitchen when BOOM there was lightning, thunder and a pop with a burning smell all at once. Next thing I know, the cat comes charging out of the bedroom making a noise I never heard before. So, I get a sadly dim flashlight and check out the damage to find the outlet cover had exploded and its smouldering pieces all over the bedroom floor. Well, at 10pm at home I'm usually barefoot and my shoes are kept- guess where- in the bedroom. The only pair I could find in rooms that didn't have shattered outlet were a pair of silver mules from Fredericks- if you go back in posts there is a picture of them.

So I was dealing with electrical issues in silver heels, a tank top and terry-cloth shorts. Wielding a broom and dust-pan, I'm happy to report the situation was handeled, I hope the electrician won't charge too too much. So that is the story of Monday night, if you have the urge to send me a little gift from my Amazon wishlist it would sure make me feel better ;)

"Bloodsucking Fiends" was a good fun read! I'll have to add more of his books to my wishlist. Sure would be nice if the generous sender would give me a call so I can thank you. It is still hot everywhere but fall stuff is hitting the stores now which I love. According to the magazines long leather gloves are going to be a key accessory this fall and I am going to stock up. Gloves add an air of mystery to an outfit as well as keeping those little hands warm. I even wore jeans in honor of the approaching season, they looked great but it is still too hot to wear them often.

Wolford Stockings and an intriguing book! You know the way to my heart already B. Appealing to the senses with luxury along with a mind tickle is my idea of a great time, thank-you so much. made an appointment for a waxing tomorrow so the legs will be perfectly smooth when I stretch out the present over my skin. Unless something comes up, I should be finished reading "Oryx and Crake" tonight and will start on the "Fiends". Big kiss blown at you!

Oohh, I can't wait for the surprise Coyote! Yay and thank-you! I discovered your blog, and it is a hot one. Drop me a comment or email if you would like me to add the link- it's in my personal bookmarks now.

For some reason the only browser that will let me into my blog is Firefox, which is why it's been a while since I've posted. It has been rainy as hell all week, well for two days but that seems like a week, you know? So today will have to be an awesome workout to make up for missing 2 in a row. Also, it's product review time!

You may know that I have big hair unintentionally, it just happens and putting gel in it to weigh it down feels gross. So, for taking out poofiness, reducing frizz and making soft shiny waves the Holy Grail shampoo and conditioner is... (trumpets playing) Paul Mitchell Super Skinny Shampoo and Daily Treatment. It smells good not overpowering or perfum-y and doesn't leave any coating on the hair, just leaves it the way I like it, and this is during the rainy season too.

Every good review must have a bad one to even things out, and the disappointment of the week is wine. Alice White Lexia 2006 looks nice in the bottle, get it in your mouth and it tastes like a mixture of Chanel no 5 and pears. Cloyingly sweet and sadly low in alcohol content, it put a frown on my face and compelled me to eat hot spicy pickles to get rid of the aftertaste.

It has been pointed out to me that I need some more fun posts, and since I hope the point has been made about what NOT to call me about, I will. If you feel the desire to give me a little present for any reason, please check out my amazon giftlist on the button :)

I went out last night and had a really fun time, which was surprising because the beginning of the night kinda sucked, bad music (think, "My Humps" and that girlfriend song by the pussycat someones)played overly loud in an attempt to disguise the lameness of the bar we started out in. I didn't mind the place being slow, that was the reason we picked it, so we could catch up on old friends that hadn't seen each other in a while. But shouting and a bartender that ignores your pleas to turn it down a tad gets old quickly, and I found myself in a taxi on the way to bar #2. I had pretty low expectations at that point, but damn it was fun! An attractive crowd, people I knew, and hilarious drunk ladies dancing (writhing) to some "I'm in Love With a Stripper" song added up to a seriously good time.

I hope you are having a great weekend too, even if your hot date involves watching the live feed of "Big Brother" and abusing yourself over Jen LOL

Discipline time. Do not call me expecting to talk about incest or any illegal stuff. Period.

I have discovered a failproof way to get people to call me- simply go out to very noisy places and forget to change my call status to, unavailable. Sorry!! On Thursday I was invited to go out to Buckhead with a bunch of friends and aquaintences Friday evening. Well, my hair had grown so long that it was bothering my back and best in a ponytail most of the time, so I decided to get a cut and blow-out. Luckily I did this before my sytlist had to go out of town to work on some of the girls in the Miss Florida pageant. So, if you were wondering why my hair leans toward big and long rather then edgy and modern, there you go. Annd, since I was paying someone to groom me, why stop there right? Next stop, pedicure and eyebrow shaping.

Basically the excuse for leaving my 'call me' on is self-absorption. I was not alone however, and the night was a reminder that just because a beer is $8.75 does not mean that the club will be comfortable. It should dammit, I want a place to sit, good scenery, and an attendent in the Ladies Room. The tiring evening did make me enjoy my night tonight hanging out with a friend at home watching "The Fantastic Four" while eating home-made pizza that much more. I do like clubbing and going out to eat, but twice a week is enough for me.

Were you curious about this week's toe color? Hot barbie pink.

Is this phone working? Come on now, I'm wide awake and need someone to chat with. It must be the dog days of summer, I haven't even felt like going shopping lately. Hmm, doesn't feel like the flu but it must be something. In computer news, I discovered why my flashy bar thing sometimes suddenly jumps back into a previously written sentence, it happens when my thumb grazes the mousepad on my laptop. Must find some way to disable that, until then I am typing with my thumbs up like a variation of drinking the tea with the pinky extended. Not too comfy, that. There must be some good things about the long hot summer but I can't come up with any right now. Oh well, time to plan a winter vacation. With the fourth of july coming up, my picture pack is very appropriate, go to my listing on Keen to get a set for yourself. Low-cut tight red cami, white shrug tied suggestively under my bust, and super short denim mini. Can't get much more American than that!

Thank-you! For making my birthday so wonderful, I am enjoying all of the gifts received so far! If you somehow forgot, it isn't too late to send me an amazon gift certificate or tip me via Keen. I took lots of new pictures today, wearing some of the new jewelry- a woman can never have to much! Estate jewelry has always been where my interest lies, even more now that I am aware of the corruption involved in mining for stones. The workmanship really cannot be equalled at all anymore and especially for the price.

HA! Why didn't anyone tell me that the age on my profile is 250?? That is so funny that now I am going with it- my birthday is this month (the big 251) so when you want to flip me a gift certificate fell free to do it thru Amazon, it is confidential so you won't be lucky enough to have me show up at your front door in a polka-dot halter summer dress and white high heels. I told one of my friends today that he gets one wish per day- and it is being fulfilled right now. Just wait until tomorrow morning bwahaha.....

Saw "Bug" last weekend too. This movie didn't suck, but it was really unenjoyable to watch in spite of quite good acting, male nudity, and fair dialog. Unless you are super patient and into observing the growth of crazy, wait for a night when nothing else is on cable. Personally, when I want to observe mentally ill people I can just drive to the nearest bus-stop or hit a tavern on the first of the month. Insensitive much?

Good morning! I have lots of fun errands to do today (Department of Motor Vehicles anyone?) so I won't be around til later. Looks like a certain someone found his motivation again, I was wondering about that. Eat some lunch today why don't you- a nice turkey sandwich will help you fit in those silky slips nicely.

Scroll down if your name begins with an M. Good morning! I had lots of fun yesterday chatting with new friends and I had two dates yesterday also-hee. A nice luch date at a fairly new place not far from me with yummy food and fair service. My coffee cup needs to stay full! The service will probably get better, it is the kind of place that hires servers based mostly on looks from what I can tell. Common practice in urban areas, I don't get it- as long as my server appears clean I could care less how they look (ok, cute flirtatious male servers are a plus but that combo is rare).
Later on I went to see a band that was quite good. Cover band too, and fearless in the songs chosen- mostly classic hard rock songs that usually sound like crap when covered but in this case were surprisingly cool. I looked great also! Amazingly I found a shirt that expanded flatteringly across my bust- no pulling of the buttons, and slims closely under the bust and around my waist so you can see my shape rather then billowing fabric, and is long enough to cover the waistband of low-rise jeans. I want ten more in all different colors yet fear it was a fluke in the factory. At least I found this one :)

Whoa! Watched "Dogville" last night with a friend who said, "This is the weirdest movie I've ever seen." That's saying a lot considering he's watched enough movies with me that he is now unfazed by subtitles and indie film strangeness. I am shallow I guess, because I was quite glad to see Grace do what she did at the end, especially as I have seen movies by Lars Von Trier before and in those films the belaugered heroine usually dies.If you haven't, be warned that his films are not conducive to the date getting any hotter. Yeah, I realize that enjoying her burst of violence means that I am just as moralless (I made up that word!) as the creepy citizens of Dogville. Eek, floating flashing bar thing keeps making me put letters in the middle of already written sentences. Must figure out how to prevent that.

Money finally hit my account, so today was pedicure, eyebrow and hair day Yay! My toes look so pretty I can hardly stop looking at them, and the non-bushiness of my brows is very pleasing. This was me last night playing with the camera. Forgive the weird shadows, I never met a lamp with an unique glass treatment I didn't like ;) Call me!

Ack! Dead computer. I went out yesterday and bought a Macbook to avoid these damn virus issues. Too bad I am having such problems figuring it out! The iphoto thing is probably very easy to use- what I want to do is go into my photobucket account and download all of my pictures that are hosted there into my mac photos. This was pretty easy on the windows laptop but I have no clue how to do it on the new one so I can't send anyone pictures. Poo. Cutting and pasting the link doesn't work so please don't suggest that. Also, I would love to have a bunch of different safari windows on the screen at the same time, not shrunk down in the dock. Anyone know how to do that? Oh well, at least the phone both works and I know how to use it. That's a hint!

How the other half lives...I have a good friend here in town, she is about the same age as myself and we share wicked senses of humor and close to the same size in clothes. Other then that, her life is completely opposite of mine. She has kids and a big house in the suburbs, as well as the $$ to go out of town on holiday weekends (disclaimer, I was invited to go to the shore this weekend but already accepted an invite to one of my good friend's birthday parties that I really wanted to attend). The thing is, criminals in our metro area have finally gotten smart enough to target the better neighborhoods instead of leaving them alone to do crimes in their own 'hoods.
Which all means that she needed a house-sitter this weekend and I am happy to oblige. Everything about her house is big. Right now, the computer I am typing on has the monitor like three feet away and a ginormous desk. I use a laptop out of necessity due to space issues in my condo. Upstairs is unknown territory for this weekend, been there while she and the kids are home, but if you think I'm wandering up there while I'm here alone forget it. I've seen a horror movie or two in time.
This much everything is a lot to handle- yes it's the American dream and cool for a weekend or two, but when I get home to a TV that I can figure out and my single bathroom I will be fine with that. Oh god the air-conditioner just made a noise- at least I hope that's what it was....

Beer! Did that capture your attention? I hope so, because it is Unbiased and Potentially Mean Review of Products time! The other day I picked up a six-pack of organic beer, Stone Mill pale ale from Green Valley Brewing. This beer would probably help alcoholics to recover by turning them off of drinking. It is dark beer, tastes like flat slightly empty Guinness as if an important beer-making step was skipped. So, it didn't exactly make me crave another. I used some of it to deglaze a pan on which I had just finished making a steak and sliced portabello mushrooms. The result was a smoky and dark background, so the plan for the rest of the six-pack is to play around using them in cooking or marinades.

Since I like to balance out bad reviews with good ones- Loreal True Match super-blendable powder is awesome! It helps to know which foundation you wear when choosing the color, I didn't, so I found a mirror at Target (surprisingly difficult in the make-up section) and just looked at a couple against my face. This powder is better then my Lancome dual-finish powder foundation that cost three times as much!It does everything the name indicates; matches the color to your skin perfectly, canceling out redness and softening brown spots. The finely milled power feels silky on the skin, not rough or harsh. One nit-pick; the mirror and puff are on the opposite side on the compact as the powder, so the design could have been better. Later today, off to get a haircut, wish me luck!

Eddie the engineer is interested in my shoe collection, so I found a couple of pictures to put up here. As you can see, these are not this summer's shoes. New styles sure would be a wonderful thing to have in my closet, but I confess that even though I have purchased four pairs of shoe in the past two weeks, they have all been variations on the flip-flop. Two have the stacked heel, one is brown the other black, and a pale tan pair is more of a sandal with a little wedge that I love, and a pair of completely flat orange one just for fun.

Coughing fetish? If such a thing exists then I am your girl- this week for sure. At least I can talk and it mostly sounds like a human. I have discovered that steroids make you beautiful, and here I was worried about sprouting a beard. It seems that most of my beauty issues are allergy related and a wonderful side effect of the steroids prescribed is that they made me impervious to allergens, for now. So, I wake up with clear, bright eyes, no puffiness, no skin redness or itching, if taking these was safe for the long haul I would sign up! Since that isn't an option I have my allergen arsenal at the ready for when I'm tapered off the roids and everything starts bothering again.
During my first call this week I had a horrendous coughing fit and had to hang up- please forgive me! That is such a bummer, sounded like such an interesting guy too- I am a sucker for a deep sexy voice. So I plan to be available for calls during the day as much as possible, signing off during the coughing fits of course unless you let me know that is something you want to listen too; med students maybe?

Lost my voice!!! This is not good, it started with just flu-like feelings and now, 2 days later, my voice is gone. If I push it squeaky dolphin noises come out. The week had been going so well, making some new friends to chat with and keeping busy, as well as trying out a yoga class for the first time in years and now everything comes to a grinding halt. Tim, if you are reading this, I will be available to talk as soon as I can. Thanks Jack, I hope you enjoy the pictures you bought yesterday. Katrina, chatting with you had been totally interesting, good luck with the job hunt- I'll think of you when I'm in Sephora later today, a girl can never have enough mascara, right? Hopefully Lancome has a gift with purchase in honor of Mother's Day coming up- love their mascara. Plan for the day- get brows waxed, cat supplies at Walmart (yes, they are the devil I know)and hit the big mall for some R&R. Oh, and write three chapters...

Ok, so I have been pretty lazy about taking any new pictures of myself but today I finally did! My friend Jerry called just as I was wrapping it up so I took a couple while talking to him- the email that I sent with the pic probably didn't work, so here it is!

I just re-inserted my link here into my Keen listings, so I hope my lookers are stopping in to see my latest pedicure and other news-worthy stuff. I am purposely avoiding heavy subjects as I'm not sure how to adequately express so much emotion and leave that to those that can. So, I'm going along, working out at the gym- I discovered that when using machines to weight train my legs a most of them can be modified and used with one leg at a time. What a huge difference that makes! It feels so good to really focus on each leg separately and not have to worry that I'm cheating and using them un-equally.
My friend who is recovering from neck surgery is going to be on her own this weekend so I am going to surprise her with a slumber party. So, going to come up with a funny dvd or two, maybe a face mask, I think both of us bleaching our teeth with those big wax strips like the oral-b ones will be funny and beautifying too. Any ideas? Shoot me a comment, I'd appreciate it!

Strip-aerobics with Carmen Electra sounds titallating doesn't it? Well, the dvd I have isn't really as exciting as one would assume, in fact it is quite basic. She goes over the steps one by one, then there is a chance to do them in 'real time', but during the real time she says nothing, so if you are an impatient person like myself and want to skip the slow part, you are pretty much sol. However, just watching her is a good reminder to suck that gut in :) Also, I got a pedicure! How bout those red toes and matching lips- yikes, typos are challenging at 4am.

Hi! I am back from a long weekend, feeling rested up and ready to start some trouble! I slept to late to go to my spinning class today, that means extra time on the rowing machine tonight, unless I decide to take one of the late classes. I'm afraid those people will be way to hard-core for me, yeah, it's go at your own pace but kind of hard to do when you get caught up in the noise and excitement of the teacher yelling and the high energy music. I think I just talked myself into it!

I made gravy for the first time! With flour and everything- was inspired by Rachel Ray and it turned out really good. Since I'm on the subject of food, I promised my friends that I would blog about the experience we had last Sunday at a mom and pop type diner while I was out of town. We were in Dunedin, Fl and went for breakfast at a place called the Covered Bridge. There were empty tables (dirty) and after standing around in the small entrance for 10 minutes we finally seated ourselves. A few more minutes passed before a waitress appeared, scowling, to take away the glasses from the previous guests and wipe off the table. Our drink orders were taken in the normal amount of time, as were our breakfast orders.
I wasn't in the mood for breakfast so I ordered chicken and dumplings instead. 45 minutes later my bowl of 'chicken and dumplings' was deposited on the table- it was bright yellow sludge without a single scrap of chicken in it to be found. After spooning through it searching for chicken in vain, I gave up. 20 minutes after that my companions breakfasts finally arrived on the table, by the frowning unapologetic waitress. My friend offered me some of his steak from the steak and eggs he ordered, which I, starving, gratefully accepted. The steak was cold. Never have I been more happy (albeit hungry) to leave a diner as I was to leave the Covered Bridge.

I can't leave you with negativity, so I will add that the Kozy Korner diner in Clearwater Fl was everything the C.B. was not. A friendly hostess greeted me and my guest as soon as we entered the foyer, she seated us and brought out drinks immediately. Our server was nice, kind of Flo-ish from the old TV show, I forget the name of it. The food came out in good time, was hot and yikes there was a lot of it, the restrooms were clean, and we got out of there in 35 minutes or so- with no rushing at all. So thumbs up to Kozy Korner, next time I'm down that way I'll stop in.

Up all night! Hmmm, and I am doing absolutely nothing- posting in the hope that inspiration will strike at any moment. Well, I injured myself EXERCISING, am mostly better now. It was a weird twisted back thing that had me sleeping on the floor cuz the bed was too soft for a couple of days. I didn't realize how much relatively heavy lifting was involved in regular life until I couldn't do it. My rugs desperately need to be vacuumed that is for sure, don't even get me started on the looming mountain of laundry either. So, I went back to the gym today and worked out in spite of it- also I felt better by now, the incident was last Friday. Tomorrow looks like cleaning day. So, I am on the lookout for a man or strong woman with big warm hands to give me a massage- are you out there?

Sex and women wanting it was the hot topic of a phone conversation I had last night. A friend of mine is on a couple of internet dating sites, and has contacted a woman in his area. She told him that she is looking for a 'knight in shining armor'. He said that his armor is tin and rusty, which is funny, but I think he should just 'be' that man she wants him to be. The reasoning behind my stance is, the woman who has such a romanticized view of the man she wants is bound to be disappointed anyway, so why not just go for the illusion and have some great sex while it lasts.

The fictions that surround our lives such as the romantic wedding Disney ideal of love are impossible to sustain for any lengthy amount of time, I contend that a woman who professes to want that is looking for something that is socially acceptable yet highly unlikely because she wants have have some hot sex and this is the way women are conditioned to get it. It's "OK" to have sex with someone as long as you are 'in love' with them, according to society. So, brainwash oneself into this romantic love affair, realize later that it isn't all that romantic because hey, we live on earth not in a fairy-tale, break up with the person and start over. It's the only way society allows women to have sex with more then one person without being labeled a slut.

Then, my friend says that I am putting down women. Obviously he missed my point. I am not putting down women, it is normal and natural to want to have sex with multiple partners in one's lifetime. I would strongly prefer that it not be necessary to engage in the silly drama of falling in love every time one wants to go for it with someone else, however it is easier to go along with societal expectations (no matter how stupid) then to just be honest and go against the grain. I can't blame him for what he said, he is following the party line that a woman who wants sex is bad.

Sigh. The bright side of this is that as long as wanting sex is bad, it will have an illicit thrill that might die if we all just accepted it as a natural desire, and illicit thrills are cool.

Juicy Jackie is looking good at the gym! Right behind you hon, cute stuff to work out in sounds like a good idea. Speaking of the gym, yesterday one of the personal trainers there asked me how often I was coming in, so I told the truth 5 or 6 times a week. This started a lecture about how I needed to reduce my frequency to 3 times a week or I would surely become burned out. Did I listen to him? Well, if your definition of listening includes hearing what a person says and nodding afterwards, then yes. So, today I go in a few hours earlier and there he is working out in the main room. OK, I decide to take a class. This is the story of what it took to get me into my first Spinning class. Yowza!

The instructor was great and told me to stay only for half an hour (so now I'm committed to 30 minutes of this!) I would have anyhow, as the bike next to me was claimed by the cutest little 80 year old lady you ever hope to see. The seats were just as uncomfortable as you can imagine- but, the class was fun. Beware of the flying pigs outside, I had fun on a bicycle and plan to go back next week.

Cat news first- the vet thinks it is her cat's liver, but is still unsure of the problem even after studying the test results. She wants to get a second opinion; I don't think that will help as her vet specializes in cats and has been at it a long time. That is not the kind of thing she will want to hear, and I don't know what to do or say. It's so hard to be supportive when one thinks their friend is bent on doing something that may be ultimately self-destructive, in this case spending a lot of (needed) money on a potentially lost cause.

On a lighter note, as they say on the Today show- the workouts are going well. It's only been a week and I can already see more definition in my leg muscles. That's most likely due to less fat collected there then other body parts, but hey it's awesome to see anything happening this quickly! My theory is that going to the gym has been preventing me from shopping as much as usual- when my clothes start loosening up that will change drastically I imagine. So, better legs and less debt- so far so good!

Sad event today- I gave one of my friends a ride to the vet's office with her cat, and the kitty isn't doing well. The vet is an old-timer, and he has no idea what the problem is, so is treating the visible signs of infection and took blood to send out for a battery of tests. I'm no vet, but that cat is very sick- looking into her eyes is like looking at an expensive stuffed cat that is old and worse for he wear, no spark or focus. She was clearly the sickest cat there today.

To make things more difficult my friend has advanced anxiety disorder, and so cannot afford to continue paying for treatments that don't work, so she is freaking out with guilt over the cat and worry for her expenses. When I got home my cats seemed concerned, they have not been play-fighting but actually taking turns just hanging out close-by. I hope everyone that has pets who reads this gives them an extra little kiss today, and if you have a friend with anxiety disorder take a deep breath and give yourself some space to relax by yourself or with one of those perky people for some balance.

I adore chocolate, but am in the process of losing ten pounds forever, so yesterday at the grocery store I picked up a box of slim-fast shakes thinking to use one of them for my daily craving. Mixed feelings resulted. The chocolate-y taste is there but the ultra thick texture is hard to deal with. I'm going to save those for desperate times. Now, chocolate flavored Cool Whip is the bomb!

Hi Kevin/Bob/Ricardo or whatever name you are today! Hope you return from your out-of-body experience in time to chat with me later tonight. Also, Mr.AI fan, where have you been? On our last conversation you were having a hard time dealing with a jerky supervisor, we have all been there, so I'd love to know how work is going for you. How did you enjoy "Tears of the Black Tiger" indie guy? Not that it will be playing in my area anytime soon, while we have many many screens devoted to "Wild Hogs"- which I heard was good, still not planning to see that one though. Unless the person that recommended it gives me a call-back and fills out the review a bit more :)

There are special websites for men who like to wear corsets, just sayin'. Survived the bridal shower, barely avoided drowning in the sea of estrogen while playing 'fun' games. It wasn't that bad, and I will avoid them in the future. Jokes about whether or not to swallow are amusing for only so long- for me that is about 0.5 seconds.

Today I had a lunch date, we shared a dozen oysters- love freshly shucked oysters! My seared tuna wasn't as good, kind of tough in that may have been previously frozen way, so I didn't finish it and enjoyed a few of his buffalo shrimp which were perfect, lightly breaded and with real blue cheese dressing. My choice of coffee for a beverage was a mistake, a cold beer would have been better.

The race today is Busch Series, which I don't really follow, so not going out of my way to watch and that is about as eventful as today has been so far. Ooh, almost forgot the weather report- amazingly beautiful! Sunny, cool-ish, I had my run without being too sweaty or having any cold bits. There were some hotties out today working those muscles too.... It makes up for the intense cloudiness of last night which prevented my viewing of the red moon.

Ahh Deacon, such a romantic! I agree with you, unfortunately some couples are a bit more mercenary about things like gifts, etc. Would you prefer a white corset? I lean towards the jewel colors myself, but the innocence of white plus the wickedness of the shape enclosed would be an interesting juxtaposition.

I want to thank my UK friend for starting off my month with such an interesting call- and I must hear what you ultimately decide to do. That will depend on which head you listen to. Tomorrow I am joining a gym, I can't wait- that kind of thing is fun for me, weird I know. There is something so liberating about being sweaty and breathing heavily in a rather public place that I like, but if the 'trainer' they will inevitably push on me for my first visit thinks he or she is going to weigh me in front of everyone, no way! I'm 133 and sticking to it ;)

Thank-you Deacon! I'm glad you peek in on me now and then, I'll try to send some sunshine your way. It is fabulous here right now, sunny and cool enough so that make-up doesn't melt off your face. This post is also a vehicle for me to put up some pictures that will hopefully entice someone to call! This is the corset I bought for myself while bridal-shower shopping.

Daytona 500! Did you see that race?! What an awesome way to start the season, bump off the frontrunners, have some cool but safe crashes, shake everyone up. I hope that crew guy that was in the way is all right. And, I finally got to have some retail therapy thanks to Dillard's clearance sale. I bought a camo cami <- cute, a denim mini, a cami with retro polka dots and a pair of sleek chocolate brown wedge heel boots that I wore right out of the department. They were quite comfy for the first couple of hours but I did develop blister-like sensations after a while. Just as well, I was close to broke anyhow. My intentions to go to two malls ended then, but it wasn't over.

When I returned home my new cell phone was waiting for me, whoohoo. It has speakerphone which is very good for someone who has attended one too many Ministry concerts in her past.

It's Thursday, the day I was looking forward to so I could shop. Shopping happened, but not as planned. See, I'm invited to a wedding. I have nothing against people who want to get married, I do think it is an extremely misogynist tradition that dates back to the trade of women as if we are cattle, but never wanted to be married. Now I know why people do it. It isn't because the woman wants 'her day of non-stop attention" or so the groom will be more likely to get promoted. OK, it totally is, but it is also because of PRESENTS!

When can adults request their very own, to order, Xmas and birthday all in one? On their wedding day. This is inherently unfair to those of us who decide marriage isn't for them, but sometimes you still have to go to the wedding. So, what to do? Well, today, while perusing the bride's request list (registry) at Frederick's I decided that every dollar spent on someone else's request should at least be matched by one spent on myself for completely guilty pleasure.

So, one bra and panty for the bride, one corset and fabulous long robe for me!

I need some pictures up here don't I? It's Tuesday, and anyone who knows about such things knows that you don't shop department stores until Thursday to get a better deal- when they are starting the weekend sale. Can I hold out for 2 whole days, or will I succumb to the URGE to shop?? A plan is needed. Looking around, I see that organizing and dusting my house is a good idea, but can it compete with the thought of wandering around Nordstroms? I will let you know.

In other words, I love to get comments, but not when it is SPAM! Give it up, comments are moderated and I will reject every piece of spam I get.

Fashion week angst! It is Fashion Week right now and the upcoming trends are Anti-BOOBIES! Yep, loose tops, 60's inspired shifts, all garments lovely for the small busted and big-hipped are coming at me in full force! Really, right now I could spit out my unsweetened tea but I won't since I would just have to clean it up. Do you know what a girl with 38's looks like in a shift dress? Ever seen "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof"?, well you have probably forgotten the obnoixously pregnant wife of the other son (the not-gay one) but, yeah, thats what big tits+ no waist= equals, dowdy, frumpy ewwww. So I am going to go retro Mariyn esque this year, with the occasional superhero look cuz I love tall boots and form fitting clothes. Trends, well we will see what the shoes and handbags look like.

In other boob related news, I really am convinced that the recent growth of mine is due to something I am consuming. The scary part about that is I hardly ever eat red meat, and do eat lots of veggies and fruit. So, maybe the diet we are all encouraged to follow is high in something weird the freaks out hormones. Or, I should write a book to promote bigger breasts among the readers, hmmm, who should be models thus forcing designers to notice the curvy up top women....

Most Awesome movie I rewatched this weekend is "Vampyros Lesbos"! I told one of my friends about this film and now must tell the world!! Made in 1971 (the best time for movies) this one is visually cool, beautiful women with just enough 70's glam, think undone on the beach w/ eyeliner rather than stiff Elvis era Priscilla and you have an idea. Of course the women are naked or close to it for a lot of the film, the soundtrack is acid inspired if ever one was, and the Vampria's house is a post-mod masterpiece. Add all this to awesomely bad acting and the slowest chase scene in all of films (on the stairs)and you have some gripping 4am movie magic. I loved it so much my eye makeup was inspired, so black eyeliner and mascara here I come! If you do watch the movie I'd love to read comments about it. Also, Yay Dungy!!

I promised someone a special picture that I wanted to have a prop so he would know it was meant for him, but the prop keeps getting eaten! So, here are a couple of pics I took today- it's kind of dark due to POURING rain.

You are Bettie Page

Girl next door with a wild streak You're a famous beauty - with unique look And the people like you are cultish about it

What Famous Pinup Are You?

That's pretty funny! This too..

You Are a Bad Girl

You are 30% Good and 70% Bad You're a total bad girl, from your wild hair to tattooed toes. But you're too badass to even care if you're labeled "bad"!

Are You a Good Girl or a Bad Girl?

I'm Back!! It was pretty fun being in the snow for a little while even if it wasn't for a very good reason, water pipe issues in the vacation house that needed to be addressed. I was away from the internet for a week!! I have no idea what is going on in the world anymore so hopefully lots of you will call me and fill me in on all kinds of different stuff. I did learn that stilettoes and snow do not mix, gloves are a good thing, and that cold weather straightens my hair which is good, and dries out my lips- not so good. So I have the lip stuff on now in my blissfully warm and quiet house.

Out of town Jan 15-19th. I have to go out of town unexpectedly for the week, I hope to be back to talk to you all by Sat Jan 20th. I have a special picture coming up for Matthew that I will try to take before I go, you will understand when it is up. Hope everyone has a great week and stays warm!

Hi everyone! Yes, I have been very busy lately soo glad to be able to put an entry up today. Bought myself a new purse the other day, love that! Also found a pair of jeans that hug the curves just right, so watch out fellas haha. Last weekend was a blast, I went out with some friends Saturday night. We had dinner first at Ruby Tuesdays and I was so surprised that it was good! Also, how bout those Gators!!!! Whoohoo talk about the underdogs spanking the big boys. Well, gotta go get the oil changed in my car now- the glamorous life!